In 1996, Ron Curran took his five-year old daughter, Tiffany, to see the greatest show on earth--The Barnum & Bailey circus. According to one eyewitness (Ron Curran), Tiffany clapped wildly and spent very little time seated during the event--a spectacle she would later call, "The best birthed day ever." Now, a young adult of 17 about to turn 18, Tiffany appears to have lost that child like enthusiasm in the face of her 14th consecutive birthday spent with her father in the same fashion. Sources indicate that the arrival of two front row tickets taped to the center of Tiffany's vanity mirror was met with quiet wailing and muffled tears as Tiffany sat in her room for three hours crying.
"Or so she'd like me to think," her father reported with a wink.
Mr. Curran, a full-time tent designer, denied the possibility that Tiffany would prefer to spend her birthday with her friends while in line at the Build a Bear friend factory in Putnam County. "She'll pretend something isn't cool to trick me. I've seen this sort of thing happen many times before."
"The more disappointed she appears, the happier we really are," said Mr. Curran speaking through a bear he held in front of his face.
Tiffany, a senior at Middle Ridge High in Masco County, Rhode Island, refused to comment on her relationship with her father or the approaching big top extravaganza during cheerleading practice last Wednesday. Mr. Curran clarified that his daughter's inability to address her excitement for the circus openly is a direct result of the unfair expectations pressed upon her by her teenage friends.
"It really has a lot to do with peer pressure. If my daughter told her girlfriends she had front row tickets to the circus, they'd all want to come. That's more than I'm willing to spend on my daughter's happiness."
With Tiffany's birthday fast approaching, Mr. Curran feels no need to sell past the close on the status quo. However, he does admit that there have been a few moments where his daughter has seemed less than excited for their annual trip. "Three times this week I've opened Tiff's backpack and replaced her lunch with face paint and a rubber nose," Ron explained while taping pieces of popcorn and crackerjacks to the sides of his daughter's car.
"And each day I see the same sad, unpainted face walk through the door. It's really disappointing."
Tiffany made a quick statement to reporters before hurrying into her home and directly to her room last evening, "Now that I'm 18, I just have to wait for my acceptance letters to arrive so I can go off to college and move on with my life."
Despite negative opinion polls, Mr. Curran remains optimistic about the future. "The only application I mailed for Tiffany was Clown College," he chuckled. "I can't wait for parents' weekend."
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